: K-Meleon Forum
All which isn't K-Meleon related.
[quote="Gorilla no baka"] 1. Two blondes walked into a building...........you'd think at least > one of them would have seen it. > > 2. Phone answering machine message – '………..If you want marijuana, > press the hash key...' > > 3. A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only Clingfilm for shorts. > The shrink says, 'Well, I can clearly see you're nuts.' > > 4. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't > find any. > > 5. I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him £50 that he > couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, 'No, the steaks > are too high..' > > 6. My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in. > > 7. A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, > 'Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!' The doctor replied, 'I know > you can't, I've cut your arms off'. > > 8. I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle. > > 9. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. They lit a fire in the > craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your > kayak and heat it too. > > 10. Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered > with hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped himself. > > 11. Man goes to the doctor, with a strawberry growing out of his head. > Doc says 'I'll give you some cream to put on it.' > > 12. 'Doc I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home'. > 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome.' > 'Is it common? ' > 'It's not unusual.' > > 13. A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. 'My dog's cross-eyed, is > there anything you can do for him?' 'Well,' says the vet, 'let's have > a look at him' So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then > checks his teeth. Finally, he says, 'I'm going to have to put him > down.' > 'What? Because he's cross-eyed? ' > 'No, because he's really heavy' > > 14. Guy goes into the doctor's. 'Doc, I've got a cricket ball stuck up > my backside.' > 'How's that?' > 'Don't you start.' > > 15. Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom, boom! > > 16. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. > > 17. So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me 'Can you > give me a lift?' I said 'Sure, you look great, the world's your > oyster, go for it.' > > 18. Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. There are 5 > People in my family so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or > my Dad, or my older Brother Colin, or my younger Brother Ho-Cha-Chu. > But I think it's Colin. > > 19. Two fat blokes in a pub, one says to the other 'Your round.' The > other one says 'So are you, you fat bast**d!' > > 20. Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, > and the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the > other one off. > > 21... 'You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving > today. They left a little note on the windscreen. It said, 'Parking > Fine.' So that was nice.' > > 22. A man walked into the doctors, he said, 'I've hurt my arm in > several places' The doctor said, 'Well don't go there anymore' > > 23. Ireland 's worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a > small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery. Irish search > and rescue workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and expect that > number to climb as digging continues into the night.[/quote]
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